We're Just Getting Warmed Up ... Seriously

We're awake, and Kate Hudson is, thankfully, with us. Wish her a Happy Birthday. She's 29 and she still has our heart from her Academy Award-nominated performance in Almost Famous.

We're going to be posting a bunch, hopefully, but this ought to make your brain fall out of your skull. It did for us, but that's just because we were laughing so hard.

Derrick Rose will be a good basketball player in the NBA, that is if he avoids injury, stays out of trouble with the law and DOESN'T FIGHT ANY FOOTBALL PLAYERS. Makes us laugh because the football player is the Nelson Muntz to Rose's Martin Prince (yep, a Simpsons reference this time, so, as you can see, we're huge Matt Groening fans). (SPORTS BY BROOKS)

From the holy-shit-what-the-hell-are-you-thinking-Dwayne-Wade Department ... SBB is also reporting that Miami Heat's Lone Star, Dwayne Wade, is dating Star Jones. Yikes. Dude, you live in South Beach(full of gay dudes). You can't swing your dick without hitting a much hotter, yet gold digging, chick. We don't care if she's lost Oprah-like weight. You can do better. (SBB)

And in your current, consistent news of A-Rod, where if he farts near the Gatorade cooler it is front-page news, it seems MLB's highest-paid player doesn't like giving teammate Bobby Abreu his due props. He likes to leave the former Devil Ray hanging. (NY POST)

Sigh. We hate A-Rod news, but here it is anyways, staring at us in the face like a stripper who wants your last five dollars you were going to use for a Frisco Melt at Steak-N-Shake at 5:30 in the A.M. Not that we've been there, seriously, but it happened to our friend once. He regrets it every time our monthly trip to the strip club.

We'll, we're off to watch baseball and you can watch some with this: