It's the Crack of Noon. Time For the Truffle Shuffle

A Goonies reference with some bonus footage, plus Carmen Electra, two of our all-time favorites around here, and even though she's dating this douche, married this douche and married this guy?, we've loved her since she replaced Jenny McCarthy on Singled Out. And did you know her real name is Tara Leigh Patrick? We guess we should thank Prince for that one.

Moving along with some news that will make your brain fall out of your skull:

A lot of people showed up for a crazy thing: a baseball game in L.A. Now, if they could just get a football team. (Hartford Courant)

Eliot Spitzer night? What does it cost? A $4,000 ticket? Well, that's what the Macon Music, an independent baseball team that's part of the South Coast League, was planning until, according to Sports By Brooks, they shut down operations. To be fair, they had some good ideas to go with the night, especially the wire taps around the stadium. What's next? Twinkle Toes Night in honor of Sen. Larry Craig? (Macon Telegraph)

The Ohio State seems to be good for only two things. This and, well, losing to SEC teams. That's why the Buckeyes has scheduled a home-and-home series with Tennessee. Good move, The Ohio State. Just like this jerk and this bust. (AOL Sports)

See what happens when you cut a player like Woody Williams, a guy with a career 4.29 ERA. It'll cost ya. (SI.COM)

Where's Ted Danson when you need him? Actually, we mean Sam 'May Day" Malone making his major league comeback, the same night he's supposed to get married to Diane without Rebecca finding out? Nice Cheers reference, right? Here's a list of the worst casted actors to play sports figure roles. It's a decent list, but we like Corbin Benson in Major League and Michael J. Fox in Teen Wolf. That's not really a sports movie, though, but we can't argue with how bad Tom Cruise was in Days of Thunder. Really, Tom, really? There's wasn't anything else better to do that weekend, perhaps with Scientology? Nothing at all?

Anyways, now that we're awake, we're going to go prepare ourselves for Texas and Memphis and then Davidson and Kansas. And speaking of Prince and basketball, here's another fun classic:

What The Hell Was Kirby Doing Analyzing The NCAA Tournament?

Oh what's that? That's not Kirby? That's Bob Knight?

Anybody who has watched ESPN Thursday night or today was treated to a visually-jarring image* of Bobby freakin' Knight sporting a bright pink sweater. It wasn't pink, it was pink. Bizarreness. But hilariousness.

But now we fear clips like this just won't have the same bite they did pre-pink sweater.

*Apologies for the low-tech screen shot.

THE WHAMMY BAR: A Midday Roundup

Afternoon. And without further ado, welcome to the Whammy Bar.

First, we've never seen an episode of Heroes, but maybe we'll start watching it soon (see star of the show Hayden Panettiere, pictured).

• A lot of college basketball coaches look like other guys. Pretty funny. (MAXIM)
  

• Did Tony Romo marry Jessica Simpson? If so, we're sure T.O. shed tears at the wedding. (SPORTS BY BROOKS)

• Here's a cool website: Hula.com. It's like YouTube for television and movies, but with much higher quality. There are sporadic brief ads to sit through, but it's always worth the wait to watch classics like this.

• Mark Cuban loses to the bloggers. (NETWORK WORLD)
  

• Another reason to love baseball: new ballparks. Check out this guided tour of Washington's new venue, Nationals Park. (WASHINGTON POST)
  

• Sports Illustrated's Baseball Preview issue came out on Thursday, and it predicts the Tigers will beat the Cubs in the World Series. In no way is this newsworthy. This is the same magazine that picked the Miami Dolphins to win the Super Bowl three years ago.

• Here's more on Bob Costas' delve into the state of the sports media. (MULTICHANNEL NEWS)

We're out. That's it for now. We'll go back to trying not to laugh at Bobby Knight's pink sweater ...

Up Early With Sad News

A national hero, in our books, has passed away. Another great moment in man history, that is when Herb Peterson invented the Edd McMuffin in 1972. He died Wednesday at the age of 89. (ASSOCIATED PRESS)

Yeah, we are sad here this morning, so we're off to McDonald's to grab an Egg McMuffin and wash down our sorrows with some orange drink. We better hurry or this might happen:

THE WHAMMY BAR: A Midnight Roundup

Apologies for the lack of posts today, as we were busy getting sun cancer. Anyway, without further ado, your Midnight Whammy Bar, brought to you by that classic photo of Jennifer Aniston:

• A golf writer is on a quest to see every single hole Tiger Woods plays this year. (ESPN)
  

• We too are eagerly awaiting this. (THE BIG LEAD)
  

• An ESPN writer gets creative with his list-making, giving us the top 50 players for the next five years. But Ryan Zimmerman over Albert Pujols, Alex Rodriguez and Jose Reyes? (ESPN)
  

• Now this kind of baseball list is more like it. (SPORTSLINE)
  

• Guy blames Oreo for speeding. (ASSOCIATED PRESS)
  

• Awesomely-named sports blog. (HHR)
  

• A-Rod still isn't commenting on J-Can's allegation's. (NEW YORK TIMES)
  

• Dick Enberg is distracted. And you probably would be too. (WITH LEATHER)
  

And we'll close with the following video, which you've probably seen already, but we're sure you wouldn't mind again. When the Royals are 15 back in June, they'll at least always have this:



Can't get enough of Gathright's hops? Then go here, where this time he's jumping over cars, not first basemen.

We're out. Us and you, tomorrow at noon. Be there.

Red Sox Lose. Time to Break Out The Sake

Well, that's because the A's and the Saux have split the series. Meh. It's tough for us to get up at 6 A.M(!) to listen to John Miller suck on the ESPN teat. Anyways, the A's won 5-1 thanks to a Emil Brown three-run home run off Fantasy favorite and southpaw Jon Lester. We like that kid though. He's big on the LiveStrong bracelets, but he's allowed to be.

Anyway, that's Kelly Hu you get this morning. Don't recognize her? Then check out X-Men 2 and get back to us on that one. She wasn't just another hot mutant in that movie.

Though this is what would happen if, by the Grace of God, we would get to meet Ms. Hu:

THE WHAMMY BAR: A Midnight Roundup

Twice a day, from now on, we're going to attempt to collect an assortment of mostly sports-related stories and link them to you. And we're going to attempt to do it every day at around noon and then again at around midnight. So, without further ado, welcome to the Whammy Bar!

Good evening. And without further ado:

• In honor of the dumbest NFL rule in the history of dumb rules, here's this. Oh, and we're sure the rule has nothing to do with this guy. (WPKA, THE LEGEND OF CECILIO GUANTE)

• Everything you should know about Japanese baseball, aside from the fact that most the league's stadiums look like 1970s-era MLB venues. (ARMCHAIRGM.com)

• Make your own Eva Longoria (pictured, you're welcome) joke about Rays' prospect Evan Longoria being sent down to Triple-A. But we won't. We're not that desperate for a laugh. ZING! (MLB.com)

• Geek alert: Finally, Rock Band is coming out on the Wii. (IGN)

• Not as many people are watching the NCAA Tournament this year as much as they did in 2007. (HERALD TRIBUNE)
  

• Reading stuff like this always ruins our mood. From now on, let's just ignore it. (NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC)

• C-Webb be done. (ESPN)

• A hacker hits Facebook and private photos are made public for a while. And of course, there's a Paris Hilton connection. (TIMES ONLINE)

That's it for tonight, see you at the crack of noon tomorrow.

This Guy Should Be A National Hero

Seriously. We honestly don't think this headline can ring any truer. Bug and Cranks has posted the AP story of 26-year-old Jeff Libby who has created and sold the first “Table-Top Beer Tap” system to a sports bar in Atlanta. You can read the short blurb here, but we've attached the video below so you can salute the guy next time you see him on the street. (ASSOCIATED PRESS via BUGS AND CRANKS)

But after seeing this video below, we've packed up our '84 Sheep Dog and we're headed on a road trip to Hot-lanta. (See, we've still got street cred.) Hey, meet up with us, because once we get there, it'll be a celebration, bitches.

Canseco: A-Rod Tried To Sleep With My Wife

Does Joe Canseco have a contract with New York tabloids?

It sure seems so. Just in time for opening day, there's this, which reports Jose Canseco accuses Alex Rodriguez of trying to sleep with his wife (pictured) in Canseco's new book. And, oh yeah, there's steroid allegations too. (DEADSPIN)

Have fun with the questions, A-Rod! You too, Cynthia.

God we love baseball.

THE WHAMMY BAR: A Midday Roundup

Twice a day, from now on, we're going to attempt to collect an assortment of mostly sports-related stories and link them to you. And we're going to attempt to do it every day at around noon and then again at around midnight. So, without further ado, welcome to the Whammy Bar!

Oh and FYI: This will be another opportunity to post photos of our favorite women, and to kick off this new installment, we've chosen a classic shot of Britney Spears, who recently made her sitcom "acting" debut.

Now, without further ado:

• In Japan, the Red Sox beat the A's in extra innings in MLB's season opener. Dice-K disapoints but Manny doesn't. (ESPN)

• Is Obama sacrificing his grandmother to win the nomination? Although we kind of like Obama, it's still a good read. (SLATE.com)

• The guy who is running one of the most embarrassing NBA franchises is leaving to run the most embarrassing franchise. Wait, or is he? (INDIANAPOLIS STAR)

• Is this a sign to come for the Olympics? Some hope so. (SLATE.com)

• Jeff Ogilvy is tired of the Tiger talk. Good luck in Augusta in a couple weeks, mate. (THE PRESS ASSOCIATION)
  

• There will no such thing as the Oklahoma City Supersonics. (ESPN)
  

• A reason to hope in Green Bay? Probably not, unless Chad Johnson is too warm in Cincy. Now that would be interesting. (MILWAUKEE JOURNAL-SENTINAL)

And we'll leave you, for now, with this amazing scene from the film Death Proof (we were late on seeing it ourselves, and if you haven't seen it yet, see it).

Rick Reilly Wrote Leatherheads? Really? Huh.

With nothing but the women's tournament and the NIT going on, it's kind of slow around AndWhammy! headquarters tonight.

Anyway, we were flipping through Sports Illustrated earlier and got an empty feeling when we reached the back page. We miss Rick. Sure, sometimes he got lazy and phoned in his columns. But when he was on, he was on. And nobody was better.

So we wondered: What has he been up to while waiting for his June 1-start in Bristol?

Well, this might be news to nobody but us, but he helped write the screenplay for the upcoming George Clooney flick, Leatherheads, and we're guessing he's busy promoting that.

And of, course, he's been up to a little of this. (SAN DIEGO UNION-TRIBUNE)

Other than that, he hasn't been up to much else, at least that we can find, except for thinking of ways to spend all that money he's about to make. (NY POST, via SPORTS BY BROOKS)

SITE UPDATE: We're A Week In, And Here's Jessica Alba To Look At

AndWhammy! launched on Sunday, March 16 just before 8 p.m.

From then through March 23, according to Google Analytics, AndWhammy! has accumulated the following:

• 10,954 unique visitors.
  

• 11,578 total visits.

• 13,971 separate page views.

We'll say the same thing we said after our two-day update: We don' t think that's too shabby so far ... We mean, that is good. Right?

That's the always-reliable and never-disappointing Jessica Alba up there, another one of our -- and probably your -- all-time favorites.

Move Over NIT, The Boss Is On Campus

Cal is playing at Ohio State in the second round of the NIT and the game had to be moved to another building on the Buckeyes' campus because Bruce Springsteen is occupying the arena usually reserved for basketball.

This is the visually-jarring result, volleyball lines and all:


Man, we thought the NIT was hard to watch before ... ZING!

In related news, Thursday cannot come soon enough.

More On The ESPNNews HD Makeover

ESPNNews' impending High Definition makeover is scheduled for Sunday, and here's some more in-depth information on the innovations. (BROADCASTING AND CABLE)

Fantasy geeks should be rejoicing.

Happy Bracket Burning Day!

We hate to post and push down Ms. Burke, but we're sure you'd rather read us rant and rave and link and make funny jokes instead of looking at her, so ... here's West Virginia's mascot to look at instead. You're welcome?

With the Sweet 16 set, some thoughts and links (an no predictions, we promise):

THURSDAY'S GAMES:

Xavier-West Virginia: Some love for West Virginia, which some believe is quickly becoming a two-sport powerhouse. (SI.com)

North Carolina-Washington State: The Tar Heels are averaging about 3,000 points a game so far. It's the team to beat, by far, especially with this guy returning to form. (ASSOCIATED PRESS)

Tennessee-Louisville: Louisville has been the second-most impressive team behind the Tar Heels. And since both are in the same bracket, here's hoping for a Cardinals' win. Here's a preview. (SPORTING NEWS)

UCLA-Western Kentucky: Will UCLA need more non-calls like this to advance? (SCOUT.com)

FRIDAY'S GAMES:

Wisconsin-Davidson: No way Davidson's Stephen Curry can keep his ridiculous scoring run going against the pressure defense-driven Badgers, who led the nation in scoring defense this year. Right? Right? Maybe, because it seems Curry has been pretty unstoppable for a while.

Texas-Stanford: Texas avoided a Georgetown-like collapse against Miami and Stanford avoided an upset despite its hot-tempered coach. The whole thing kind of reminded us of this. (ESPN)

Memphis-Michigan State: The Spartans have somewhat quietly pulled off two solid wins so far and probably nobody would consider an MSU win a shocker, especially if this beaten horse continues to receive headlines. (NEW YORK TIMES)

Kansas-Villanova: Like UNC, Kansas had been totally dominant, outscoring opponents by an average of about 2,746 points so far. But as coach Bill Self said, Kansas "is not playing a 12 seed." (KANSAS CITY STAR)

With three days of Tourney-less abyss ahead, try to -- I'm going to try and say it -- enjoy ... the ... -- almost done -- Women's ... ... Tourn -- ah, I can't do it! Not in good conscience!

The NIT is on later. There, go watch that instead.

More to come later.

Davidson Beats Goliath And A Sweet Sweet 16 Is Set

Are you like us? Did you pick less than half of the Sweet 16? Then like us, you need a pick-you-up, and that comes in the form of that Brooke Burke photo up there -- which is probably our favorite photo of anything ever.

Anyway, we had Davidson Beats Goliath as our headline until we checked CBS' Sportsline only to see this in big bold letters: Davidson Beats Goliath.

Damn.

Anyhow, the Davidson upset highlighted one of the best second-round days (especially the early games) of the NCAA Tournament that we can remember, which resulted in a perfect mix of powerhouses and little guys in the Sweet 16, wethinks. It should be fun next week. Click here for all the recaps and reactions.

In a non-sports related thought, Mike Myers has a new movie coming out in June called The Love Guru, which at first glance, appears to be really confusing. And maybe funny. But that's a skeptical maybe. But confusing because, according to the trailer, Myers' character, an Indian spiritual guru-type, travels from his homeland to help a Toronto Maple Leafs star who is having a rough time with his marriage.

Huh?

And Myers' character has to save the marriage in time for the Maple Leafs to win the Stanley Cup.

Double Huh?

We know Myers is Canadian and everything, but this is a weird stretch, it seems. Or maybe he found his old jacket and got inspired.

OK, to recap: the Sweet 16 is pretty sweet, Mike Myers' new movie probably will disapoint, and Brooke Burke is hot.

Good talk.

We Totally Told You So (Thanks, ESPN!)

Yesterday we griped about how headline writers are usually pretty lazy when it comes to their verbage when Tiger Woods is contending. Either he's 'lurking' or 'in the hunt'.

Well, except when they use a certain P-word.

And the Worldwide "Leader" obviously saw that rant and wanted to help solidify our point:



We appreciate the undeniable shout-out, ESPN, but seriously, pick up a thesaurus next time.

OK, this is the last rant about this.

Back to the basketball ... where our brackets are on life-support, but could be resurrected* if Butler can pull the upset.

*Happy Easter, by the way.

Not Bad For A Realtive Nobody

Actually, we have no idea where this guy was before, but the video made us laugh. Clever. Very clever. You be the judge, though it's not as good as SNL's Dick In A Box. We still quote that one when we're in public. (Yes, we have no lives.)

Duke Blues

That picture we found pretty much says it all.

Raise your glasses, America: West Virginia 73, Duke 67.

How many more early-round exits can Coach K survive? Yeah, we asked it. And we're sure we won't be the only ones.

Lazy Headline Writers: A Lurking Tiger Is In The Hunt

Tiger Woods is in it again. Nothing shocking there. (GOLF DIGEST)

But after browsing around online, it got us thinking (and when we think, we become annoyed): When Tiger Woods is in contention, the media has it easy when it comes to verbs.

Either he's 'lurking' or 'in the hunt'. It never, ever fails.

A Google search confirmed it. A small sample of recent headlines:

• Everybody sees Tiger lurking just off pace -- The Toronto Star

• Woods lurking at World Golf Championships Event, Ogilvy leads -- AFP

• Tiger still in hunt -- Toronto Sun

• Woods already lurking at Duval -- The Courier News

• Tiger lurking one shot off pace at midway point of CA Championship -- The World

• Woods in hunt for eighth victory -- BBC

• Tiger's in the hunt with a 67 -- LA Times

• Misfiring Woods still in the hunt -- The Herald Sun

• Woods back in hunt -- The Sun-Sentinal

And, believe us, this could go on and on and on and on.

Saturday's All Right For Fighting

Yeah, we know an Elton John song. So what? You get Alessandra Ambrosio -- yeah, the gorgeous brunette of Victoria Secret fame. Lucky you. Plus, you get eight more NCAA Tournament games.

So yesterday, Tampa was dubbed Upset City. Blech. There were great games, don't get us wrong, it's just there were a slew of headlines that had Tampa in them.

Here's a few that we picked up:

Tampa, Fla.: Upset City. That was one of the lamer ones from the St. Petersburg Times. As you can see now they have something a little more tolerable.

ESPN had 'Turmoil in Tampa' late when Villanova upset Clemson (if you want to call that an upset) and now has switched to 'Upset City.'

CBS.sportline.com had 'Tremors in Tampa' which is by far our favorite.

It's just interesting how much pub that gave Tampa, which the first and second rounds hosted by the University of South Florida at the St. Pete Times Forum, where the Tampa Bay Lightning play.

Good stuff coming out of The Forum formerly known as the Ice Palace, especially Western Kentucky's Ty Rogers' game-winning shot at the buzzer to down Drake. That was probably the best one, but I'm sure San Diego has a good case with De'Jon Jackson's long jumper with 1.2 seconds left in overtime for the win. Either way, it finally added some spice to the tourney.

We'll see what happens today with action less than 15 minutes away.

In other news that will make your brain fall out of your skull:

ESPN -- who else of course -- is saying that a few teams have interest in strip club hero/cornerback (yeah, he still plays football when he's not getting arrested) Pacman Jones. But then again ESPN is just rewriting story from The Dallas Morning News, who have been all over this since the Cowboys veined interest about a month ago. Meh. We'll see what happens, cause remember, Mr. Roger Goodell, the NFL Hammer as we like to call him because he lays down the law, has not reinstated Mr. Jones yet.

Alexander Ovechkin scores 60 goals in a season. Yeah, big whoop. On a day where four higher seeds were upset, that was the biggest news out of the NHL. He's the first to do in 12 years or something, but we still bow our heads to the best mullet hockey has ever seen. This guy, who, amazingly enough, was the last guy, along with this guy, to score 60 in a season. (ASSOCIATED PRESS)

LeBron James can play basketball. Duh. LeBron set yet another scoring mark, this one for the Cavaliers. It's a good thing he set it now, that's because soon he'll be playing for the New York Knicks, as soon as this douche is gone. We have reliable sources on that one. What? No, the guy who's had too many cranberry vodkas at Bennigan's is a reliable source. That's what we learned at journalism school. (THE SEATTLE TIMES)

This just in: Andy Pettitte has back spasms caused from carrying guilt around and will have to miss a start. We kid. We kid, but seriously, our back would hurt too from throwing Roger Clemens under the bus. Have you seen Clemens recently? Looks like the only thing he's been injecting recently is Twinkies in his mouth. Anyways, Pettitte, who if you haven't heard, is not a cheater (stifles laugh) is just blowing smoke up our asses. He'll make a legitimate push for the Cy Young this year. (That made us LOL, actually). Though, this guy, will be in the Cy Young hunt.

We're serious. Didn't you know what song the stadium plays every time Wang picks up a strikeout? We'll show you the video since you're in the dark. More to come later though:

Communism Hockey Is Attacking Us Again!

It's almost 11 p.m. on Friday.

Maybe your bracket-checking isn't complete. Maybe you don't have immediate web access.

So you check ESPNNEWS to confirm some final scores.

Phew, right?

Wrong.

Apparently, some "sport" known as "hockey" occupies the breaking "news" corner on ESPNNEWS and something named "Ovechkin" scored his 60th goal of something.

God hockey sucks.

An SI Teasure Chest

Sports Illustrated's online Vault launched on Thursday, and there is an unbelievable amount of historical/nostalgic/poetic information there.

Hurry up. Go.

For those of us in our 20s or early 30s, Sports Illustrated was probably that magazine ours Dads swore by, the one publication that kept its words heavy and its covers frameable.

So anyway, all you get from SI's vault is this:

• 150,000 stories.

• 2,800 covers.

• 500,000 photographs.

And not like it matters after all that, but here are our two favorite all-time stories (off the top of our heads) that we remember from SI.

Day of Glory for a Golden Oldie -- Rick Reilly

Home Sweet Homer -- Steve Rushin

Is ESPN Actually Bitchin'?

This is kind of ticky-tacky. But whatever.

So early this morning, before the NCAA Tournament and all its insanity today, we were watching ESPN2's First Take and shuddered* when Chicago Cubs' pitcher Ryan Dempster (pictured) dared utter the word 'bitchin'** during an interview with First Take's Dana Jacobson, who probably immediately thought of this. (SPORTS ILLUSTRATED)

But pause.

Can you say 'bitchin' on ESPN and get away with it?***

Apparently.

Lucky for people who wonder about this stuff nobody, First Take re-airs at noon Eastern daily... and we totally DVRed it.

And upon watching the second airing, ESPN, given ample time to rid itself of Dempster's cursing, actually didn't edit a thing.

Hmm.

Umm. Shit. Anybody have another post idea?

*giggled.
**he totally did. seriously.
***By this point, we actually already know. But you have to wait to find out.

He's Standing in the Rain ... With His Head Hung Low ...

We were playing Guitar Hero III, so that's why you get the Foreigner reference. We really wish, hope, actually, that Juke Box Hero is on Guitar Hero IV, which comes out, conveniently enough, just in time for Christmas. Though we're really looking forward to this game coming out June 29.

And that's Jennifer Garner over there, from such films as Dude, Where's My Car?, 13 Going on 3o, The Kingdom and Daredevil. The last one is our guess how she hooked up with hubby/baby daddy Ben Affleck. He's been pretty low key recently except for directing the quiet hit Gone, Baby, Gone (we like the book better), but his baby brother, Casey, has been much better (we recommend seeing GBG, but he's really good in as Robert Ford in the The Assassination of Jesse James.)

So, what's going on with the tournament, you ask? Well, (2) Tennessee, an team headed to the Elite 8 downed (15) American University 72-57, (10) Davidson upset (7) Gonzaga 82-76, certainly screwing up some brackets. Let's be honest, Zag hasn't been the same since the stache left.

(7) Miami -- the U, so we can keep some street cred -- beat (10) Saint Mary's 78-64. And (12) Western Kentucky -- yep, the Hilltoppers, but WKU is also known to have the best photojournalism school in the nation, just in case you were curious -- are in overtime with (5) Drake in Tampa. At 88, who's going to break 100 first? Ha, trick question! Neither! No, no. We kid, we kid. We're glued to the set right now as long as James Brown (I feel good!) doesn't switch the game on us.

That's it for now, except this story: seems a Serbian swimmer has been suspended over a T-shirt and he didn't borrow it from Cynthia Rodriguez, according to the NY Post. Milorad Cavic (look him up) wore a red shirt stating: Kosovo is Serbia. Interesting, though Kosovo declared independence Feb. 17, so as far as we can guess, Cavic didn't like that move. It's a bold statement that has him completely distraught, but you know, instead of clever shirts, why not worry about beating this freak of nature next time. Yes, if you look closely, you can see an pretty gay Olympic tattoo on Michael Phelps (though he is the man who owns six gold medals at the age of 22).

Look guys. If it makes you feel any better, we'll get you a economy size pack of Venus razors. No unsightly ingrown hairs. We promise.

Okay, back to W. Kentucky and Drake. We'll be back later, but here's arguably the best music video of all time:

Don't Get Eliminated!

Morning all. Two things we woke up to this morning. First was that crappy show, Charmed, but the upside is that the show has the likes of Rose McGowan, Alyssa Milano and (see right) Kaley Cuoco. If she looks familiar, that's because she got her big break as the hot thong daughter of the late-John Ritter in 8 Simple Rules. It's true we know TV too well, which also means we have no life. But MXC was on Spike, so we watched some Asian people get hurt.

Now some things that will make your brain fall out of your skull:

Freddy Adu ain't no kid anymore. The U-23 National Team of America! defeated those pesky Canadians (that's what it's all aboot, eh?) 3-0 to secure an Olympic berth. (FOXSPORTS.COM)

MeAngelo Hall (read: another douche from Virginia Tech) will have some additonial Me time on his hands (clap clap). Yep, that was a Styx reference. Anyways, Hall signs a seven-year, $70 million contract with the Raiders, cause, we guess, he enjoys losing. Yeah, we admit Hall is a great shutdown cornerback, but as signing contracts with the Raiders go, or dealing with Al Davis that he's still alive, that basically makes